It happened on the walk into school.
Your 5-year-old spotted another child and said, loudly, "Why doesn't she have hair??"
You froze. Your face got hot. You wanted to disappear.
Did the other parent hear? Did the child hear? What do you even say right now?
You feel conflicted because on one end, you don't want to shame your child's curiosity but you also don't want to raise a kid who makes other people feel bad about their bodies.
So what do you do?
In the moment, many parents I work with find themselves nervously laughing it off, changing the subject, or quietly say "Shhh, we don't say that."
Then walking away feeling like they missed the moment and handled it all wrong.
It’s not that parents want to shut down their kids. It’s just that many of us were never taught how to navigate these conversations and so naturally, they catch us off guard.
Well, if any of this is resonating, today we’re going to take steps to fix that.
I'm walking you through exactly what to do when your child points out physical differences - whether it's hair, skin color, body size, disabilities, or anything else that catches their attention.
Let's make sure you're ready for the next time this happens (because it will happen again).
In this newsletter, you'll learn:
- Why children point out differences (and why it's actually developmentally healthy)
- The exact script to use in the moment when your child says something mortifying
- How to address body boundaries without shaming curiosity
- What to say when the difference is about race, disability, or body size
- When and how to circle back later to reinforce the lesson
- What to do if the other person definitely heard what your child said
